Suicide Express (Commodore 64) Review
Suicide Express is one of those games that probably shouldn’t scare you, but does. Forget tales of what you used to get up to behind the school bike sheds; fear of a cassette tape should remain the prime secret you don’t want to drunkenly blurt to friends at social gatherings.
Even the greeting given by the emo-friendly title sends a shiver down the spine. You can thank the ever-wonderful SID chip for that - it’s distinctive sounds of rich eerie sawtooth melodies sent this reviewer sucking her thumb behind a cushion.
The gameplay itself is slightly tricky. The main objective is to guide your train through increasingly complex birdseye-view tracks that, failing regular eye rests, will have your head spinning.
For an 8-bit title the graphics are visually acceptable (if occasionally confusing). The action is fast. Very fast, in fact. One moment of lost concentration will see your efforts dashed in a colourful detonation of pixelated anger. Despite this, the player has a niggling urge to continue. Giving up is not an option here. This game is highly addictive.
The train itself is controlled by either joystick or keyboard. I personally found the former more intuitive, and in no time found myself track-dodging, enemy-shooting (this is one pimped-up train) and racing at high speed down the railway line, as SID accompanied me with the very same urgent quavered melody I had previewed from the menu screen.
Although Suicide Express would be of little interest to most modern gamers who are fed on a high-fibre diet of short epic movies and graphics-rich storylines, those who appreciate the original concept of ‘videogaming’ will rejoice at its addictive simplistic nature.
Alas, despite all skill and said addictive joystick-throttling, all journeys must terminate. My personal journey happened to do so after a particularly grueling chase, with an all-mighty thwacking crash of a finale.
But just when you’re counting the dead and fooled into believing that the bloodcurdling bad dream has ended in a crescendo of white noise, you jump right behind the couch once more.
And let me tell you why: Suicide Express was widely known to be one of the first games to include a synthesized voice, in this case used to read the defeated users end game score. Yes, it was indeed this audio aid that sent me helplessly fleeing the telly screen once more. Maybe it’s just me, but I found its wavering robotic readout almost terrifying. Self admittedly I’m the sort to be scared of my own shadow, but the fact that a game was actually talking to me still gives me the slight shakes.
This recent revisit to Suicide Express for the purpose of review was something I thought I could handle sensibly. After all, I’m an adult, for goodness sake. But d’you know, despite constant reassurances of “but it’s just a game!”, I think I’ll play it safe and take the bus to work tomorrow...
Labels: 8-bit, commodore, gaming, retro, review, suicide express